A poem for yesterday

Behind the closed door rests the open mind
Awaiting the signal it is safe to come out
Hoping against hope it won't come today
Maybe tomorrow, if that would hold sway

We squawk in our caged black and white world
Flagrantly ignoring that gray matters
Scouring our tablets and smartphones and toys
For like-minded thinkers instructing whom to avoid

Both Real and Perceived injustice are spotted
Hiding in plain sight
Look! can't you see them!
Right there, peering out from behind the tree of knowledge

And now they step out from the shadows
Each bringing their supporters into the arena
On separate sides of the ring
Marching down the aisle of indignation
As the crowd cheers them on

Anticipation grows as the fight draws near
Perceived reaching the ring first
With fist held high and emotions aflare
Waiting for Real to enter the glare

But Real is impervious to taunting and screams
For he wears the crown of the champion
Really only showing for the payday
That comes with this display

Now deafening the roar of voices
bloodlust awoken and seeking the righteous victor
Anticipating the sound of the bell
That opens the closed door

Yet the rounds go by and it becomes clear
The opponents, though trying, can not land a punch
Each moving and swaying with increasing unease
Drained of self confidence degree by degree

The crowd is still yelling
Unnerved by the sight
That their own personal champion
Can not win this fight

So the door slowly closes
As the final bell rings
And the winner is chosen
By whomever pulls the strings...

Superbowl mystery solved

Dear Congressman,

My apologies for my lack of activity over the last year or so, but then again, I think the same could be said about you and your fellow members of the House.

But that is not why I am writing today.

I think I have come up with a solution for the inability of the local professional football team to win a Superbowl. In retrospect, I should have thought of this sooner, but the continuous bi-polar status of joy followed quickly by overwhelming grief on an annual basis that dictates the lives of all Cincinnati Bengal fans shielded me from the true source of the problem for many years.

I took a long session of critical thinking on my part to come up with the idea, which entailed staring at the practice field next to Paul Brown Stadium as my bus raced past on it's way to the airport. I then took the time during my lunch break to verify if I was correct in my assumption, which I was.

So, since you have read this far, you might as well review my data.

Teams named after People	Games	Win	Loss
Pittsburgh Steelers	8	6	2
Dallas Cowboys	8	5	3
New England Patriots	7	3	4
San Francisco 49ers	6	5	1
Green Bay Packers	5	4	1
Los Angeles/Oakland Raiders	5	3	2
Washington Redskins	5	3	2
Minnesota Vikings	4	0	4
Kansas City Chiefs	2	1	1
Houston Texans	0	0	0
Tampa Bay Buccaneers	1	1	0
	51	31	20
Named after Horses	Games	Win	Loss
Baltimore/Indianapolis Colts	4	2	2
Denver Broncos	7	2	5
	11	4	7
Named after Birds	Games	Win	Loss
Seattle Seahawks	2	1	1
Baltimore Ravens	2	2	0
Philadelphia Eagles	2	0	2
Atlanta Falcons	1	0	1
Arizona Cardinals	1	0	1
	8	3	5
Named after mythical tall people	Games	Win	Loss
New York Giants	5	4	1
Tennessee Titans	1	0	1
	6	4	2
Named after Miscellanous Animal Kingdom	Games	Win	Loss
Miami Dolphins	5	2	3
Buffalo Bills	4	0	4
Los Angeles/St. Louis Rams	3	1	2
Chicago Bears	2	1	1
	14	4	10
Other Intangible Names	Games	Win	Loss
New York Jets	1	1	0
New Orleans Saints	1	1	0
San Diego Chargers	1	0	1
Cleveland Browns	0	0	0
	3	2	1
Named after Cats	Games	Win	Loss
Detroit Lions	0	0	0
Jacksonville Jaguars	0	0	0
Carolina Panthers	1	0	1
Cincinnati Bengals	2	0	2
	3	0	3

So there it is, a team named after a type of kitty cat has NEVER WON THE SUPERBOWL.

Thus, I now propose an experiment. For one season we refer to the Bengals as something other than a cat, maybe adopt the unofficial ESPN name of the Bungles. Or may just the Bens, in honor of Ben Franklin, since, after all, that is what this is all about anyway.

Go Bens Go Bens Go Bens!